Do you ever have days where you wish we, those who were made in your image, would just get our lives together? I sometimes wonder things such as that….. As I sit here and wonder. I know you want a relationship with all of us. You want all of us to believe in you. To surrender to you. To have faith in you. I’m listening to a debate online right now between an atheist and a former Muslim, who is now a christian and it is very interesting. However, it makes me wonder about different things at times. Like now…….
I know I pray every morning to you. You’ve helped me so much; yet I feel so small in comparison to you. I’ve been working so hard on remaining positive, but I feel my strength waning. Not my strength in you, but I’m feeling very tired. Very fatigued. But it is my physical strength or my mental strength. I just want to sleep. I feel like I did when I was Vitamin D toxic. I’m wondering if I should go back to the doctor and see if something is wrong again. The fatigue is something pretty bad again and I haven’t felt like this in quite awhile. I guess I better call. It takes everything to keep going for me.
I’m encouraged to be listening to a really great podcast called Life is a Marathon @LifeIs262 and love it! I’m also listening to a book on cd entitled “The Power of Positive Thinking” by Vincent Norman Peale. It’s been fantastic so far. I’ve also purchased the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0 to read and learn from. I have plenty to keep me busy and to help me work further on my healing. I give you thanks and praise for all of the tools you are giving me to help me continue on my road of recovery.
I thank you for ensuring I didn’t lose my cool today at work. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to walk 2.5 miles today at work on my lunch hour. Thank you for the sunshine. Thank you for stopping me from calling and ordering take-out which I did not need and would have cost me way more money than I needed to spend and instead making dinner myself. Thank you for helping me learn to be more humble, learning to love people for who they are, learning to love people period, learning to have more discernment, learning to not take things personally, learning to have more wisdom, learning to have patience. For being grateful for what I have and not needing or wanting more than I already have. For being content. For all of the blessings you have poured out on me and into my life. You have bestowed upon me so many riches that I am astounded.
Thank you for continually enriching my life by bringing to mind that you can help me if I simply come to you and ask for your help. If I remember to call out to you. If I remember to come to you first instead of last. If I remember to pray without ceasing. You are faithful as long as I am faithful as well.
I need to learn from the knee of my teacher. Help me to learn. Help me to grow. Provide me with the need. Provide me with the want.to know more.
I know all things are possible through Jesus Christ, according to His will. May His will be done, here on Earth, as it is done in Heaven. May I be a blessing in Your eyes. May my heart please you. Please continue to renew my mind and change my heart.
Your faithful servant………….