I never wanted to believe that I was truly addicted to food. I wanted to keep my head buried in the sand. I wanted to blame my weight issues on other factors – PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), insulin resistance, my gut/stomach issues, not exercising, etc.
I used to weigh a heck of a lot more than I do now. I was at one point 375 pounds. I’m now 221 pounds. I did get down 165, but then gained 20 pounds and was at 185 and was happy there. But then the bottom dropped out in my life and I gained more weight and have been hovering around the 225/220 area for awhile now.
I’m supposed to stay away from gluten-laden foods and anything processed since it aggravates my stomach/gut issues plus it will raise my blood sugars and I don’t want to go back on medication for my PCOS. I’ve been eating at fast food restaurants, or going to the supermarket delis and grabbing food that is not good for me.
For the past 3 weeks, I’ve been exercising every day. I’ve been walking every day at lunch for at least a half hour and ensuring I reach my goal of 10,000 steps. But this does no good if I’m not eating healthy.
Yesterday, as I’m on the treadmill at work for the 2nd time in an effort to reach my 10,000 steps, and am not liking being on the treadmill, I start praying to God. I figure I should make the best use of my time. I’m not sure if God would agree with my thinking, but to me it worked. I was trying to remain positive about my workout and my purpose and my plan. Look at all of those “my’s”. Those really should be replaced with God’s purpose and God’s plan……. I digress…….. anyway, I asked God for help with my food addiction. It just popped into my head. Out of nowhere! So I prayed and asked for the help.
So, when I went to the grocery store for only a couple of things (and ended up with a whole basket full of good food – and I’m not kidding either) I did roam past the aisle with dip for potato chips and my favorite dip was not there. So I took that to be God’s hand had played a role and He had answered my prayer to help me with my food addiction. No favorite dip meant I would not be buying any potato chips and dip. Whenever I would buy this duo meant I would eat the whole bag and container in one sitting and then feel incredibly sick for two days. Additionally, I would also feel guilty and like a fat pig for almost a month afterward.
So, score one for God! He does answer prayers. He does care about the little prayers. The things that we think he could care less about.
I will still have to conquer my food addictions each and every day. This is a battle I need to deal with until I deal with the underlying issues of my child sexual abuse. I realize that is where the root of my food addictions lie. Who would have thought that they are interconnected? How odd………….
However, I have God by my side. I have the biggest and best warrior on my side. I have the best weapon to be able to defeat this addiction – GOD!
I’m going to be forward thinking. I’m going to be thanking God every day that he helped me to defeat my food additions. I’m going with the thought pattern that my food addictions are already defeated. That I am no longer a slave to the food addictions. That I no longer like those nasty foods. That I am no longer lured by them. That God will deliver me from the food addictions.
For when you have a God as great as the God I worship and praise, what or who can be against you? NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!